33 days sober:
Today in church I heard something that really made me stop and think. How do I go through life cheating myself of my full potential? That was the essence of the discussion in church, and it really made me think about what I do in life halfheartedly or without the full diligence that I should. Now as I sat down to think about what to write, I pondered how my recovery has gone when it was halfhearted recovery - it hasn't gone anywhere!
Any time my heart isn't really into recovery I don't make any progress. Right now, I am dedicated to recovery because I can see the hope and joy that I will get from it. I want my wife to feel comfortable with me and not wonder if I am cheating on her or anything...or for her to wonder if she is enough for me. I want her to feel fulfilled and appreciated. I want my kids to know a kind, loving father who is supportive, thoughtful, and every other good attribute that I could ever think of!
I am so grateful for my life. I think the gratitude that I have been working on has really helped me to get this much sobriety. I don't think I have had 33 days of recovery, but I am sure glad that I have this much sobriety so that I can have a lesser portion of the impulsiveness that is more prevalent when acting out. I feel like I am slowly making progress in recovery. I am inspired by this when I think of a scripture out of the Book of Mormon. A prophet says, "Now ye may suppose that this is foolishness in me; but behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass." (Alma 37:6) I know that as I keep moving forward, I will be able to reach my dreams.
This is my daily check in and this is my hope for another 24 hours!
-Grateful and Hopeful
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